Face of Love
by Nephthys Snape
Summary: Kakashi has never took part in any holiday festivities. But now, he has a reason to, and maybe he'll learn what he's always been missing. Disclaimer I own nothing but the plot bunny. Yaoi.


Kakashi had spent Christmas alone since he was thirteen. Usually, he tried to be on a mission while everyone else celebrated. If not, he visited Obito just before dawn then sequestered himself away at home until the whole mess was over.

Even after he had a genin team, he'd not celebrated. Despite the attempts of his students. Sakura had her family. Naruto had Iruka, who had Naruto. And Sasuke . . . He had ghosts. Kakashi hadn't felt close enough to them that one year the four were a team to even think about doing something with any of them. Even Sasuke, who he should have if for no other reason than he was alone and Obito would have expected it of him.

Then, Sasuke was gone. Still alone, Kakashi watched as Naruto had ever more people in his life. As Sakura renewed old friendships and made new. He stayed alone, even when asked to join them.

The last gift he could remember caring about was the last one Minato had given him. A copy of the first book Jiraiya had ever written. He remembered Kushina thinking it was a horrible gift for a child but Minato had been adamant. Kakashi now owned every book Jiraiya had written.

His closet had filled over the years with unopened gifts from Genma, Gai, Kurenai, Asuma, Sarutobi, Tenzou . . . Anyone that felt it necessary to try to cheer him up or spread the holiday cheer. And now, the gifts from Naruto and Sakura joined the rest. Even Iruka, Lee, Hinata, and shockingly Kiba and Shino had begun giving him gifts.

Not once did he open one. Not once did he actually say 'thank you'. Never did he give a gift himself. Then . . . Then Jiraiya came into his life as more than his sensei's sensei. More than the author of his favorite novels. As more than Naruto's new sensei.

_Until tonight_

_My heart was just half full_

_I'd never known the fruit which fed the soul_

_But now I see what may put to rest my longing_

So, Kakashi found himself doing the one thing he thought he would never do. Buying a Christmas present. He had no real idea what made a Christmas gift. All those unwanted, unopened, unappreciated gifts piled deep in his closet left him no clue. But for once, he had someone in his life he wished to make happy on Christmas. Someone who made him happy just by being alive, not to mention at his side.

He spent days then weeks fretting over what the perfect gift would be. To the point he was ready to settle for ordinary and nice instead of perfect. He just wanted something to show he had put in the effort. Truly, he couldn't understand why people went to so much trouble every year, more than once if you included birthdays. Another stack of unopened presents in a different closet . . .

The only reason Kakashi was doing this was because it was expected. And . . . He wanted to make Jiraiya happy, see him smile and know that his small (grand really, if you asked him) gesture was appreciated. It never occurred to the copy-nin that maybe all those times someone gave him something, they wanted to feel that very same thing.

Eventually, he finally decided that instead of a material gift, he would make a Christmas Eve night Jiraiya would never forget. What more could the man want that good food, good company, and then a good long night of passionate sex?

_In silence I feared my heart_

_Would remain words unheard_

_Inside a separateness of skin_

_But now I know that the skin just veils the soul_

While shopping for items he needed to make the perfect romantic Christmas, he found something. After all his hard searching, the perfect gift was innocently found when he wasn't even looking for it. Sitting in the back of a shop he'd been told was the best place to find candles. The shop carried many different items, all imported from various countries, lands. Honestly, glancing around, he could have shopped for everyone he knew with ease in one place. Not that he intended to do so.

Purchasing his candles, new sheets, exotic chocolates, the present for Jiraiya, and a new pot for Mr. Ukki; Kakashi bustled home to prepare things for his special evening with the sannin. He had three hours before he'd told the man to arrive. Luckily, he was a fast worker, when he wished to be. The work took only half the time, and he only had one minor interruption.

Naruto made his annual Christmas Eve stop, bearing yet another gift for the depths of his closet. This year, his boyfriend of eight months, Hyuuga Neji, accompanied him. Also, new this year was the lack of wrapping. Naruto simply handed him the newest Icha Icha, which he personally knew wasn't on the market yet. Jiraiya had not let him peek at it either. That meant the older man had given it to the boy to give to him.

The seventeen-year-old smiled and told him he couldn't just shove it in the closet now and forget about it. Kakashi wondered how he knew, but realized there were many ways someone could deduce his habit. Most notably, no one ever saw their gifts again after wrapping them and handing them over to the jounin. It wasn't like Naruto didn't have access to the closet either, or that Jiraiya couldn't have seen them and said something. Both spent time at Kakashi's off and on. Jiraiya quite frequently anymore.

Naruto further explained that he wanted to give his former sensei and teammate something he would actually like. Stating he hated how the copy-nin never liked any of the other gifts anyone had given him and he wanted to change that. He had then hugged the older man with a grin.

Kakashi had nodded to the teens and quickly made his excuses to get them to leave, Naruto exuberantly dragging his boyfriend off when they did. The jounin itched to start his new book but knew he had to finish his preparations first. Once finished with those, he sat and opened his book. He had an hour and a half to read before Jiraiya would arrive.

Normally, he wouldn't have noticed writing on the inside, but Naruto had been considerate by putting it on a small card instead of the inside cover. Kakashi laid the note aside, more intent on his book for the moment. He would look at it later, knowing it couldn't be that important to need his immediate attention.

_So take my hand knowing_

_With it I also give my heart_

_Wanting never to be separate again_

_Let eternity begin_

The hour and a half breezed by quickly as the copy-nin read. The sound of geta outside his door spurred him into reality. He jumped up, turned out the lights, lit the candles, and pulled dinner out of the warm oven in a matter of seconds. By the time Jiraiya was inside and the door closed, the food was on the table and Kakashi was at this side with a warm smile.

Jiraiya smirked at his lover, well aware of the mad rush the younger man had just made. "Let me guess," he chuckled, "busy reading Naruto's present?" His smirk grew when Kakashi rubbed the back of his head with a sheepish smile. The sannin chuckled again and moved passed the smaller man. "Food smells delicious."

Kakashi smiled and followed the older man to the table, waiting until he was seated before serving him. He then served himself and sat. He felt his cheeks pink ever so slightly at the deep loving look Jiraiya fixed upon him. To recover, he reached forward and slowly began to feed his lover. Jiraiya returned the favor gladly.

They slowly fed one another, making small talk on nothing important as they ate. Both were happy to just sit in one another's company and to dote on the other in a simple but affectionate way. Time, troubles, and the world in general melted away until nothing existed but the two of them.

Dinner ended with Kakashi bringing out a dish of the chocolates he had bought as well as Jiraiya's gift. He led his lover into the sitting room and sat the chocolates on the small coffee table. He then sat and handed the present to the other man. "It's not much but . . ." He shrugged almost indifferently but for the small tinge of pink on his cheeks.

Jiraiya smiled and accepted the gift then slid one out of his top for the jounin. He smiled as Kakashi took it and almost eagerly opened it. Why the man didn't want the gifts he had stashed all over the place, he didn't know, but he was glad he wanted this one.

Both ninjas opened their gifts silently. Kakashi losing a few tears of joy over the one of a kind personalized Icha Icha book Jiraiya had written just for him. It depicted some of their most prized moments, mostly in bed (or whatever surface, vertical or horizontal, they decided to use). Jiraiya gasped at the gold, ivory, and wooden spyglass resting in his hands. It was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen.

Jiraiya took the book out of Kakashi's hands and set it on the table with his new spyglass. Ignoring the chocolate, he pulled his lover into his lap. He kissed him slowly, taking time to savor the taste of their meal with a unique hint of Kakashi's own flavor. The taste was intoxicating, driving him to run his tongue slowly over the inside of his lover's mouth sensually. A moan vibrated from Kakashi's tongue along Jiraiya's and into Jiraiya's nerves.

"Bed," the sannin spoke softly against the jounin's lips. Kakashi nodded, giving another slow kiss to his lover before getting up, sliding his body against the firm one beneath him as he did. He made his way to the bedroom, discarding his clothing as he went. Leaving a nice trail for the sannin to follow.

_If you were flame_

_I'd allow myself to be consumed completely_

_Were you wind I would wish you pass_

_through me_

_But now I know that the skin just veils the soul_

The image on the bed made Jiraiya simply stop and stare. Kakashi's pale skin lit by candle and moon light shone against the dark charcoal silk sheets that adorned the bed. He could feel himself about to drool and his nose about to bleed. No sight in the world would ever be more erotic . . .

Or so he thought until he saw Kakashi start to stroke himself lazily while sucking on two fingers on the other hand. The copy-nin met Jiraiya's eyes and held them as his free hand moved under his bent leg, which was spread wide from his other leg, and slide the two spit slick digits into his own ass. He moaned low and deep, head falling back against the pillows behind him.

Jiraiya had seen plenty of people unable to do two separate things with their hands, even a few shinobi, but the precision and finesse with which his lover stroked himself while finger fucking himself should have been an art form. He could feel the dampness of his own pre-cum spreading over the inside of his pants. He quickly divested himself and made his way over to the bed. He stood watching his lover, wrapping his hand around himself and stroking in time with Kakashi's stroking.

Kakashi watched the older man with slitted eyes. He licked his lips. The thought of that thick cock in his ass made him stroke harder. He watched as glistening drops of pre-cum bubbled out of the end of Jiraiya's erection to be swallowed in a broad hand and rubbed over the length of the broad cock, making it glisten in the candlelight. Pulling his hand out of his own ass, he rolled over onto his hands and knees and wiggled his ass toward his lover.

The sannin didn't need told twice. He moved forward and slid into his lover with one slow thrust. Both men moaned as his cock was swallowed by Kakashi's tight ring of muscle. "I think you get tighter each time we do this," Jiraiya panted against his jounin's back.

"Gai . . ." He groaned as Jiraiya shifted. " . . . told me about some exercises . . . Fuck, move already," he growled, wiggling back against the author. "They tighten up your ass," he finished, fisting his hands in the sheets as Jiraiya finally began to pull out then thrust back in slowly.

Jiraiya moved ever so slowly, enjoying the feel of his lover tight around him. Enjoying being able to feel every beat of Kakashi's heart and every slight shift made by the man's hips. He was being swallowed into ecstacy and soon to lose control if he didn't distract himself with words. "I'll have to thank you," he said before his mouth became occupied.

He raked his teeth over the nape of Kakashi's neck before biting his way down the silver-haired man's spine. Each bite was hard but not enough to draw blood. And each left a small hickey in its wake. A line of love bites to proclaim the jounin claimed, owned by the man above him.

Kakashi moaned, tossing his head back as he moved back into his lover. "Please, Jiraiya. Take me harder, faster."

"Tell me how you want me, Kakashi. Tell me how badly you want my cock and how you want it," he breathed into his lover's ear. One hand reached under the copy-nin, grasping the hard flesh bouncing between his legs. "Do you want me so hard your dick smacks into your stomach over and over until it leaves marks behind? Do you want me so fast that I come quickly and have to suck you off? Or do you want me to take you so hard and fast you pass out from the explosion of your orgasm?"

"Please," was all Kakashi could whimper. He wanted all of those things and so much more. His heart leapt into his throat when Jiraiya's hand slapped down on his ass sharply. On the second smack, he cried out.

"Tell me what you want, Kakashi, or shall I spank you until you do?" He brought his hand down a third time, loving the way it caused Kakashi's muscles to shudder around him. Kakashi could only moan.

True to his word, Jiraiya smacked him on the same spot once again. He rubbed the spot tenderly before bring his hand down in three sharp and quick successive strikes. Kakashi whimpered under him, eyes closed tightly and hands fisted in the sheets. The flesh of Kakashi's cock pulsed in his palm, throbbing with the need to release. He tightened his grip to forestall the climax.

"You're not coming until I get what I want, Kakashi." He spanked him thrice more with slightly harder blows. "Tell me what you want. That's all you have to do to stop the spanking, to be allowed to come."

Kakashi whimpered yet again. "I want you to fuck me. Take me so hard I bleed. Take me until you come so deep inside I can taste it," he finally answered.

Jiraiya was nothing if not an accommodating lover. If that was Kakashi's wish, then that Kakashi would have. He let his lover cool down enough he could remove his hand from his flesh without him coming then and there. Then he took a firm hold on the thin hips before him. His thumbs caressed the hips as he began to drive in and out of the smaller man with increasing speed. A slight shift of his hips had him driving against Kakashi's prostate on each deep, hard thrust. The cries of the jounin were music to his ears, driving him harder and faster still. Slowly, his control began to leave him and before too long he was fucking Kakashi with wild abandon.

The feel of the fat cock driving into him and against his prostate made Kakashi feel like he was on fire. The pain and pleasure mixed sending him to new heights of intense passion. He could feel his climax building but wished for it to wait just a little longer. A moment, a minute, ten minutes . . . He didn't care. He just wanted to experience the feeling he was having a little longer.

Finally, he could take no more. He came so hard he saw stars as his semen splashed onto the new sheets. Then, he passed out just as he felt hot come splattered against his insides. If this was what happened on Christmas, he could get use to celebrating the holiday.

_For I have seen, the face of love_

_The grace of God, the face of love_

Kakashi didn't walk right for two days after that mind blowing fucking. Jiraiya had babied him at first but quickly gave up when Kakashi had growled and smacked him over the head. Which he did a second time when Jiraiya commented he was spending too much time around Iruka if he was beginning to behave like him and maybe he should mention it to Kotetsu and Izumo. The two would no doubt try to rip Kakashi to pieces if they thought he was moving in on what was theirs. And everyone knew Iruka was theirs without a doubt.

It was on the third day after his special night with Jiraiya that he found the note he'd set aside. The note that had come with the book Naruto had given him. Curious, he unfolded it to see what it said.

_Kakashi-_

_I know you don't like Christmas, and I'm sorry you can't share in and understand what the rest of us do, but I will never give up on you. Just know it's not the getting of gifts that is so important, it's the giving of gifts. To know that we can share a small token of friendship, love with those that mean more to us than anything. It makes us feel good to give you a piece of our time, our joy, our love. Maybe ero-sennin will make you see that. True gifts are things put into boxes to be wrapped in fancy paper and pretty bows. True gifts are things we can't see. They're time spent with family and friends. Time spent caring and loving those who mean the world to you._

_And while it may hurt that you don't care enough to care that we spent time to pick out gifts for you, we'll never give up. Never stop giving you those gifts because we know, deep down, you do appreciate them. Deep down it means the world to you that so many people care about you. And one of these days, you'll open those gifts and shed a tear. You'll see that we all love you and want you to know that. And one day, maybe you'll love us, too._

_-Naruto_

Kakashi sat staring at the note. He could feel a tear slipping down his cheek and reached up to wipe it away. He was glad he'd not read the note when Naruto had given him the book. Then he'd not have been able to spend the night as he had.

Standing up, he made his way to his closet and opened the door. Seventeen years of gifts sat collecting dust and staring back at him. Seventeen years of hiding from the world and avoiding making strong bonds with others. Nearly two decades . . . And now he had formed a strong bond, a permanent bond. Did he need to hide anymore?

Giving a small smile, he wondered what the hell he was going to do with it all once he opened them and saw what they were. Not to mention all the birthday gifts in the bedroom closet . . .

And above all else, he knew that in heaven, or whatever place it was his old sensei found himself, Minato was smiling with pride. His sensei, his pupil, and his son formed a circle that filled the void he'd left behind. Teaching each other and loving each other . . . Like a true family.


End file.
